Lightworker

Pressing Patients Too Early Doesn’t Work

A study designed to assess the usefulness of a single session of motivational interviewing in drug abuse treatment showed that the single session of the psychotherapy technique had no effect on drug use outcomes. However, results of a subsequent analysis suggest that the therapist may have pressed for change before the individual was ready.

Motivational interviewing is designed to strengthen a person’s commitment to changing their behavior by focusing on such factors as desire, self-efficacy, need, readiness, and reasons. In the original study, University of New Mexico researchers randomly assigned 152 outpatients and 56 inpatients to receive or not receive a single session of motivational interviewing as part of their drug abuse therapy.

The researchers assessed drug use at the pretreatment baseline and at 3, 6, 9, and 12 months following study entry. They found that adding a single session of motivational interviewing failed to have a positive effect on abstinence.

In a follow-up study, a psycholinguist watched videotapes of 84 persons undergoing motivational interviewing — representing a subset of individuals from the earlier study — and their therapists to analyze the language they used.

For the psycholinguistic analysis, each session was broken into four parts: motivational interviewing, assessment feedback, additional motivational interviewing, and developing a change plan. The researchers found that during the motivational interviewing segments, the study participants used language that showed a strong commitment to drug abstinence.

However, the analysis also revealed that individuals began “resisting,” or using weaker language, when the therapist switched to giving assessment feedback. There was also a precipitous decline in commitment language when the therapist pressed for a plan to initiate behavior changes.

The finding from the first study — the failure of motivational interviewing to have a positive impact on drug use behaviors — was unexpected because previous assessments had shown that the technique improved treatment retention, adherence, and outcome. Results of the second study suggest that therapists should modify manual-guided motivational interviewing techniques when faced with individuals whose language, especially during assessment feedback, begins to reflect a decline in their initial desire to reduce drug use. By pressing for change before a person is ready, the therapist can undermine the existing motivation for behavior change.

Dr. William Miller and his colleagues published these NIDA-funded studies in the August 2003 and October 2003 issues of the Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology

PERFECTIONISM

“We have the need to be accepted and to be loved by others, but we cannot accept and love ourselves. The more self-love we have, the less we will experience self-abuse. Self-abuse comes from self-rejection, and self-rejection comes from having an image of what it means to be perfect and never measuring up to that ideal. Our image of perfection is the reason we reject ourselves the way we are, and why we don’t accept others the way they are.”

– Don Miguel Ruiz

“Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life…”

– Anne Lamott

“Perfection leaves so little room for improvement. So little space for acceptance — or joy. …Start thinking of yourself as an artist and your life as a work-in-progress. Works-in-progress are never perfect. But changes can be made…Art evolves. So does life. Art is never stagnant. Neither is life. The beautiful, authentic life you are creating for yourself is your art. It’s the highest art.”

– Sarah Ban Breathnach

Do not run through life so fast that you forget
not only where you have been, but also where you are going.

Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored
each step of the way.

My Creed

I would be true, for there are those who trust me;
I would be pure, for there are those who care;
I would be strong, for there is much to suffer;
I would be brave, for there is much to dare.
I would be friend of all - the foe, the friendless;
I would be giving, and forget the gift.
I would be humble, for I know my weakness;
I would look up - and laugh - and love - and lift.

~ Howard Arnold Walter ~

Mention skills and we usually think of things like playing a musical
instrument, dancing, or cooking. We seldom think of things like
ATTITUDES that, in sum, equal self-esteem. But attitudes are skills.
Perhaps one of the least mentioned is the skill of forgiveness.
There are many unfairnesses to forgive in this unfair world. Life often
is frustrating and full of disappointments. At times there are genuine
insults and tramatic absurdities that befall us. All are capable of
destroying our self-esteem if we don’t learn to become peacemakers
rather than grudge-holders.
The skill of forgiveness, like any skill, must be practiced daily. An
attitude of acceptance, sailing along on the greased rails of habit,
enables us to forgive life for not being what we wanted it to be. We
spare ourselves much regret when we come to peaceful terms with our own
personal histories. If we didn’t live up to our fondest expectations,
that isn’t so bad. Even those who have done us legitimate harm can be
forgiven once we realize that NOT forgiving only prolongs the injury.
~Taken from the book: Believing in Myself by: Earnie Larsen & Carol
Hegarty~

WE HAVE THE CHOICE TO LIVE WITH high-altitude attitudes filled with optimism, enthusiasm, and excitement or to mope along with an Eeyore attitude of , “It’s not much of a tail anyway . . .” Do our attitudes reflect the pure, clean, and heady atmosphere of high altitudes or are they murky and smog-congested? How we see life is up to each of us. If we don’t like the view, we all can possess the courage and ability to change it.

At times Eeyore rides heavily on our shoulder, pessimistically warning us not to be too excited, too naive, or too enthusiastic. Not only are such low-rise attitudes depressing, they’re boring. We can change our attitudes by becoming very aware of our thoughts and substituting positive thoughts for Eeyore thoughts. We choose our attitudes.

Imagine yourself on the top of a beautiful mountain. Feel the air, so clear it is like a zillion flawless diamonds reflecting the glistening sunlight. Bask in it. Take the magnificent view into your body–feel yourself expanding and lightening up. Say “Yes” to life! Feel yourself absorbing and exuding optimistic, powerful, and loving attitudes.

Choosing your attitudes, whether high or low, Pooh or Eeyore, determines whether you are happy or not. Have the courage to give yourself permission to live high, lightly, and with a resounding “Yes” in your heart. It is our choice, for we are the only guardians of our attitudes.

I am light and I reflect light to others.

Meditations For Empowerment & Peace of Mind

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
–Eleanor Roosevelt

Happiness is good health and bad memory.
- INGRID BERGMAN -

Trouble getting a good night’ sleep?

If you are having trouble getting a good nights sleep, take a look at your bedtime diet. While a light snack may help you relax before sleeping, you should avoid heavy meals and fluids that stimulate stomach acid production and could cause heartburn. Also, consider whether intake of caffeine, chocolate or alcohol is affecting your sleep.

- Mayo Clinic -

Preparation is important, but it is not enough. Planning can be very helpful, and yet it is not enough.

Being inspired fills you with positive energy, and still it is not enough. Getting yourself motivated is great, but there’s more to achievement than all these things.

For achievement requires performance. After all the planning, preparation and motivation, you must get up, get out there, and make it happen. Once you start to take action, you cross a threshold, and suddenly your perspective changes. You’ve gone beyond the stage of getting ready and into the realm of actually creating the achievement.

Once you’ve started to take action, you’re committed to following through with all that is in you. Put everything you have into the best, most positive, creative and valuable performance you can imagine.

Achievement comes to those who go beyond the training, beyond the planning, beyond the motivation and into the zone of effective action. Achievement belongs to those who choose to become fully immersed in the performance.

Hearts Across the World
By Amsheva Miller

Clattering along in the hot Indian sun, our train neared the southern city of Nagpur, India. Beside me this Thanksgiving Day sat my husband and our two adopted Indian sons. We were traveling to Nagpur to meet the small Indian girl we were adopting to complete our family. Sadly, because the foreign adoption process takes a long time, we would not be able to take our daughter home to the United States right away. But at least we could visit her for a few hours.
Three years earlier, I had come to India from our home in Maryland and established a second residence in Hyderabad, near the orphanage where I was adopting my sons. Now I was staying in Hyderabad again, and my husband was visiting briefly from Maryland, where his job supported our efforts to adopt this little girl. The duration of my stay would be determined by the slow-moving Indian adoption court, a system over which we had no control. But at least for a few hours on this hot day, we could be a family.
Shortly after lunch, a bicycle rickshaw carried us the last miles to the overcrowded orphanage where we were greeted by a hundred eager faces, each hoping to belong to us. The sight was heartbreaking. And yet the people in charge seemed genuinely to care for the children, and the conditions, though humble, were orderly.
We waited, fidgeting in our seats, until a small, delicate girl was escorted into the room. Immediately, I recognized the child my heart had been praying for daily for almost a year. Ghita, our daughter! We hugged and kissed her in our joy, creating in that moment a bond that would last a lifetime.
Ghita could not speak a word of English, but it didn’t matter. She was our daughter, and at last our family would be complete. We shared some ice cream and looked at picture books, then parted with tear-stained smiles, knowing that in a month we could be together for good.
My husband returned to his job in the States, and I
settled in with my sons in Hyderabad, almost 300 miles from the Nagpur orphanage, anxiously awaiting notification that Ghita’s papers were processed. I often lay awake at night, imagining myself holding her in my arms and protecting her from harm in the crowded orphanage. She was so delicate, so trusting.
Finally the news arrived that I could proceed to Nagpur immediately to take custody of my daughter. Wasting no time, I arranged to travel by air, so that I would not have to leave my boys overnight. Then it happened - the Hindu temple at Ayodhya in the north was bombed by Muslims. Although we were thousands of miles away, Hyderabad was a heavily Muslim city. All flights were canceled for fear of terrorism, and the entire city was placed under curfew.
Undaunted, I decided to travel to Nagpur by train instead, making arrangements for my sons to stay with friends. But our hired driver, himself a devout Muslim, advised against it. “Madam, you would not come home alive!” He explained that an American woman traveling alone would be a prime target for random violence. My close Hindu friends gave me the same advice and urged me to abandon my plans.
Then I hit on the idea of driving to Nagpur. After all, I reasoned, my driver was Muslim and I knew I could trust him. He had even helped us secure food during curfew, allowing the children and me to stay safely at home. But again he discouraged me. “Madam,” he said, “I am only one man. What can I do against a gang of robbers? Be safe - remain at home!” I had to remember my responsibility to the children I already had, so I sadly surrendered to the reality that there was nothing to do but wait.
As the days turned into weeks and weeks into months, I prayed daily for my little daughter in the orphanage. What did she think? Did she even know why I hadn’t come? My sons grew more agitated and harder to handle. I desperately needed support, but my husband and friends were 10,000 miles away. As the challenges I faced grew more severe, I realized that I alone had to meet them, through my own inner strength. Keep cool. Try to act normal. God, please give me the strength I need to get through this.
Gradually the tension between the Hindus and Muslims dissolved, curfew was lifted, and life in the city normalized. It was now March, four months since that sunny Thanksgiving Day when we met Ghita. My husband came to visit again, and I felt I had passed an enormous test. I could take a deep breath now and feel some lightness in my heart - and there in my heart was Ghita.
Then the miracle - the news that flights to Nagpur had resumed! We acted like lightning and within a few hours were holding tickets for the next day’s flight.
The bicycle rickshaw to the orphanage seemed to move in slow motion. I could hardly contain myself. Then, finally, the moment we had waited for arrived. Out of the crowd of eager faces, I saw only one - one shining little face that stepped forward and said, “Mommy!” It was her first English word, spoken with eyes as big as the universe and enough love to last a lifetime.

Reprinted by permission of Amsheva Miller (c) 1997 from Chicken Soup for the Mother’s Soul by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Jennifer Read Hawthorne and Marci Shimoff. In order to protect the rights of the copyright holder, no portion of this publication may be reproduced without prior written consent. All rights reserved.

One Wing Angel

I was laid off for six months and my health began to compromise my ability to work outside my home. The reality that I may never return to office work pierced through me. The only positive thing in my life was that I was over half way through completing a correspondence writing course. I was writing a new story for an assignment based on my mother who was battling cancer when she became unexpectedly pregnant with me. Without hesitation, she made the life changing and risky decision to stop radiation therapy. She gave birth to me at the expense of losing her right arm and shoulder to an uncontrollable Desmoid tumor when I was six months old.One day while I was browsing a craft store; I remember thinking to myself, “Has any of my past career successes been worthy of my mother’s sacrifice? Is writing my new career? I need a sign.” Two seconds later, as I was leaving the store, I was drawn to a discount table strewn with knick-knacks. I wasn’t looking at anything in particular when my right hand picked up a wooden angel figurine. It was a simple, lovely piece. The angel had golden hair and wore a patriotic style gown. I quickly discovered I couldn’t put it down or walk away from the table without purchasing it. I felt a heavy pressure upon my shoulders as if someone was leading me toward the check-out line.

When I arrived home, I excitedly walked into my dining room and took the angel figurine from the sack to place her in my curio cabinet. As I stood back to admire her, I gasped in disbelief. I picked up the figurine again and realized the angel bore ONE wing. My husband walked into the room and calmly pointed out, “She has one wing, just like your mom.” We carefully turned the angel over onto her back to discover no evidence she was ever made with two wings.

This one-winged angel figurine is no doubt a sign as it is an image that I understand. Ever since then, I have been actively pursuing a writing career and I have recently completed my first book manuscript. Each time I look at my angel figurine, I know that I am on the right career path.